Once Upon a Time

The bride wore an antique lace dress with a perfectly cut mid-calf hemline. Her long brown hair was pulled back with tiny jeweled pins creating a cascade of ringlets that bounced and flowed down her back. Her face was flush with the excitement of the moment and her eyes sparkled with joy as she started down the aisle to meet the love of her life waiting at the altar to make her his bride. She was beautiful.

The groom was equally impressive. Dressed in dark slacks and a white shirt and tie he stood six feet tall with long, straight dark hair that parted in the middle framing his rugged, handsome face. His blue eyes were fixed on the vision in lace walking toward him and a smile lit up his face.

It was at that moment that I sensed the pure magic of this moment.

The brother of the bride escorted his soon to be married sister down the aisle on his right arm. Cradled in his left arm was a sleeping infant. Huh? What! Hold on a minute! Did you say sleeping infant? Now that’s something different (and you thought this was going to be your typical fairy tale, happily ever after wedding).

Wrong! There is nothing even remotely typical about this couple and the story that led them up to this moment. You see, this is my nephew Joe, who, if you have been following my blog, you met in an earlier post, ( Dec. 30, 2009) and my niece by marriage, Amanda.

From a desperate life of drug addiction, hopelessness, homelessness, death, and despair, this couple by the grace of God, experienced an about face “turnaround” in their lives (and the lives of their two boys) that is nothing short of miraculous. In the process of this transformational life overhaul, they have touched the lives of many other people –many of whom filled the wedding chapel to capacity.

So clearly this was not your typical wedding. Rather, it was a milestone of celebration in a relationship that has seen lower lows and higher highs than most of us can even imagine. This special wedding day was 18 years in the making - with a lot of pain, loss, and heartache along the way.

The truth be told, these two didn’t stand a chance of making it and many times over the years, I was quite sure they wouldn’t. But God had other plans. He used their unique circumstances to radically alter the course of their lives and to significantly impact the lives of many other people from all walks of life (as was evidenced by the diverse backgrounds and lifestyles of the people who attended this wedding celebration.

It’s amazing what God can do with a life that is yielded up to Him – and congratulations to Joe, Amanda, and their boys (Chris and Zack). We’re proud of you! May God’s richest blessings bring you great joy, meaning, purpose, and fulfillment as you continue to live, love, laugh, learn, and leave a legacy for those whose lives you inspire.

Big Faith, Big Results

My husband Curt is a wonderful man. (If you don’t believe me, just ask him.) He is a strong and courageous man of great faith and strong character and God is as real to him as breathing.

As a lifelong entrepreneur and business owner with a heart for ministry, Curt loves to start things from scratch and transform ideas and visions into reality. Over the years nearly four dozen new business and ministry start ups (47) have benefited from Curt’s visionary leadership. With few exceptions, God’s blessing on Curt’s many endeavors has led to financial success and the time freedom and flexibility that passive income produces.

The last few years have been an exception – not that God’s blessing has been removed but that God’s blessing has not led to financial success. In fact, the last few years have been filled with many good ideas that didn’t work (at least not yet). And financially, these have been the most difficult years we have ever known. But I wouldn’t trade them for anything.

About two and a half years ago, Curt and I both felt God leading us to have Curt surrender some licenses that provided us with $90,000 to $100,000 a year in passive income from a business he built in the mid-nineties. We pulled the plug on that income stream in September 2008 and Curt was excited to venture into new areas and master new skills. But the amount of extreme difficulty and long delay in these endeavors has been unlike anything we have ever experienced.

I can only stand back and marvel as I see God’s hand upon Curt and observe the unwavering faith that continues to sustain him through a seemingly unending stream of setbacks and challenges. After thirty long months of struggle, some of his ventures are finally coming together and the possibility of actually generating enough profit to create an income seems to be just around the corner.

I know that he is grateful that we are getting close to profitability and will be excited when our financial situation improves. But as I observe Curt’s life and faith, I realize that it’s not about the money. It’s about the people in his life and the powerful ways God uses my husband to influence them. God’s blessing on Curt’s life flows out of his willingness to be used by God in the lives of others.

We have a friend who’s business was in disarray when he asked Curt to step in and “take the reins” in an effort to turn his businesses around. After nine months, the business is stabilized and growing. But the bigger news has been the way God has used Curt to bring this man closer to God and to radically alter his life and lifestyle. Curt is now mentoring him in business (and in life) and they have become close friends. Curt even performed his wedding recently.

Last spring Curt sensed God leading him to the owner of the gym where he works out. Without knowing why (or if he would be laughed out of town), he walked up to her, shared a bit of his background in business, and asked if he could help with anything. After a few smaller projects, they found a way to work together and her business is now beginning to flourish and they recently even made an offer on a second location.

But the bigger news is that she felt stuck and had been praying for a way to either grow or leave the business she once loved. She recently told Curt that she believes he is God’s answer to her prayers of quiet desperation. How cool is that?

Because Curt’s faith in God is so big and so real, he chooses every day to let go of his fears and doubts about the future and simply trusts that God will continue to provide for us and meet our needs (something I struggle with from time to time). As a result, God uses him mightily in the lives of others.

Even a little faith produces results but big faith produces big results – and huge blessings for everyone involved.

No Cracks

A cracked foundation is no laughing matter. We’ve been dealing with one recently.

My grandson is seven years old and one of his favorite Christmas gifts was a large and extravagant Legos castle. With his dad’s help, he assembled this spectacular edifice in less than a week. He was proud of his masterpiece and we were impressed with the quality of his work.

Then came the post-Christmas “let’s get the house back in order” day when it was time to move his masterpiece from the front room to his bedroom. He prepared for this castle relocation project by carefully placing the structure in a box. During the move he dropped the box and after hours and days of hard work, his masterpiece crumbled to pieces in an instant.

Fighting back tears, he placed the box of broken pieces at my feet and asked for help. I am not a structural engineer by any stretch of the imagination and fixing things is not high on my list of life skills. He was hoping that his grandma could repair the damage and restore his creation. I was quite confident I would not be much help at all.

So I did the one thing I knew I was good at - I sat down beside him on the floor and gave him a big hug. Then something interesting happened. As I held him in my arms, I looked at the largest chunk of the broken Lego castle and noticed a crack on the far side of the floor piece and it occurred to me that this cracked foundation was the primary source of the problem.

I reconnected the broken floor piece to the rest of the foundation and suddenly realized that for the most part, the castle had simply broken in two. Once the crack was repaired and the foundation was back in place, it was easy to see how everything else fit into place. My grandson’s castle creation was restored to its original beauty in less than 10 minutes.

The obvious moral of this life lesson is that once the foundation is restored, the rest of the pieces fall into place. As I explained what had happened and how important it is to start with a good foundation, I heard God’s still small voice talking to me.

I was suddenly aware of my recent struggle with feeling that my life is falling apart – that huge parts of my life are crumbling and things I’ve been comfortable with for years lay in pieces on the floor. I realized it was time for a foundation inspection – time to discover any cracks in the foundation of my relationship with God. I remembered that unless I repair these cracks and reconnect to my rock solid foundation everyday, the broken pieces of my life will remain in a shattered state of “unfixable” chaos.

As is often the case, God used my seven year old grandson to teach me the lesson I was trying to teach him. Here’s to a rock solid foundation with no cracks in 2011.

Making a Difference in 2011

I love the week between Christmas and New Years Day. I love the fresh start, clean slate, second chance, new season, do-over feeling that New Year expectations bring. The start of another year is definitely the time for New Beginnings.

I’ve been thinking about how to make a difference in 2011 . How about you? Are you looking for anything more or different in any area of your life in 2011? Do you want to be the same person you were in 2010 or do you want to learn and grow and change? Do you desire to have, to do, and to be something more – someone better? I know I do.

My husband is a goal setter and planner. There are three things I’ve learned from him…
Going with the flow will always take you downstream.
A pile of lumber in the yard never becomes a house.
Nothing will change in my life until I change.

In other words, 2011 will only be a great year if we decide today to make it so. All the potential in the world won’t make it so. Wanting it more than we’ve ever wanted anything won’t make it so.

The only way to make 2011 count is…
An intentional decision to possess, accomplish or become something more, something different, or something better.
Specific goals by which changes can and will be measured.
Clear and definitive written plans to reach the goals and
A commitment to immediate and continuing action to execute that plan starting today.

Here are five prerequisites that will keep us on track as we dream, set goals, and plan for 2011.

First… Ask God what he wants from you.

I urge you therefore, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. ~ Romans 12:1

Present yourself to God in prayer. Ask him what he wants from you this year. God speaks most clearly to those who are ready to listen. Usually, we must commit to obey before God will speak.

Second… Pay attention to who God created you to be.

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place – when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. ~ Psalm 139:13-16

God knows everything about us; more than we know about ourselves. Ask him to help you discover the specific purposes for which he has hard-wired you. We all love and serve God best by loving and serving people. But each of us are created and called to do it differently. Pay attention to the blueprint of how God has uniquely shaped you for loving and serving people.

Third… Remove the obstacles before you begin.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. ~ Hebrews 12:1

You know your weak spots. Take steps to eliminate them. Get creative. Think outside the box. Don’t set impossible goals and don’t ignore the things that you already know will hinder and encumber you. Keep it real. Ask for help.

Fourth… Commit fully and engage immediately.

Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might, for in the grave, where you are going, there is neither working nor planning nor knowledge nor wisdom. ~ Ecclesiastes 9:10

Say what you will do and do what you say. Make a commitment and get started. Conditions will never be perfect. A good plan aggressively executed today is better than a perfect plan executed sometime next week.

Fifth… Stand strong against the fear of failure.

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go. ~ Joshua 1:9

The fear of failure keeps many people from starting. Fear is a powerful foe. Don’t let it stop you. The essence of courage is feeling the fear and moving forward in spite of it. Besides, failing is not failure. Not trying is the only true failure. I like my husband’s motto, “If you’re going to go down, go down in flames.”

2011 will not be a great year just because we want it to be great. Don’t let the clock strike midnight tonight without completing your plan to make a difference in 2011.

Happy New Year and may God Bless each of you.

The Nativity

The Christmas tree is perfect. Colorful lights hang from the eaves and sparkle merrily from the trees in our yard. There is a small choir of blow up snowmen caroling near the deck next to an animated reindeer. A row of super-sized candy canes lines the sidewalk and magically illumines the path for Santa to make his way to our house.

I love Christmas decorations – especially the kind that light up when you plug them in and this wonderfully creative homage to the traditions of Christmas makes me happy. But as I step back and survey our winter wonderland display, I notice that something is terribly wrong with this picture. Something’s missing.

Where is the nativity? How does baby Jesus fit into all of this? Is there still a place for the Christ child of Christmas who is after all, the reason for the season? Why is the hope of a hopeless world missing from his “holy day” celebration? If Immanuel means “God with us,” where is he? In the profound words of a seven year-old boy visiting Santa at the mall, “Where’s the line for Jesus?”

As I pondered these questions, I realized that none of us are immune from the powerful influence of the world in which we live. We are often unaware of our tendency to avoid “politically incorrect” references to God, Jesus, and all things religious – even at Christmas. And that’s what is wrong with this picture.

God sent his only son to earth to reconcile us to himself and provide salvation from the penalty of sin to those who had rejected him (you and me). Jesus Christ, the Son of God was born of a virgin and entered our world as a tiny babe with no place to lay his head but on a bed of straw in a manger.

He lived an exemplary life without sin and died a criminal’s death he didn’t deserve after being falsely accused and convicted. His cruel and painful crucifixion paid the death penalty for my sin (and yours) and his resurrection from the dead three days later provided us with new life – a second chance, clean slate, do-over.

The cost of this amazing gift – a simple yet heartfelt step of faith – a choice to believe in the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus and the forgiveness of sin and new life he offers.

As a society, we continue to marginalize God and remove his fingerprints from all aspects of public life. At the same time, a growing sense of hopelessness, helplessness, emptiness, isolation, futility, fear, death, and despair overwhelms us and strips meaning and purpose from our lives.

The “good news of great joy for people everywhere” is a much-needed message in 21st century America. For unto us a child is born. Unto us a son is given. Unto us is born this day in the city of David a Savior who is Christ the Lord. His name shall be Immanuel – God with us.

The Story of the Four Candles

The Four Candles burned slowly. Their ambiance was so soft you could hear them speak.

The first candle said, "I am Peace but these days, nobody wants to keep me lit." Then the flame of Peace slowly diminished and went out completely.

The second candle said, "I am Faith but these days, I am no longer indispensable." Then the flame of Faith slowly diminished and went out completely.

Sadly the third candle spoke, "I am love and I haven't the strength to stay lit any longer. People put me aside and don't understand my importance. They even forget to love those nearest to them." And waiting no longer, love went out completely.

Suddenly, a child entered the room and saw the three candles no longer burning. The child began to cry. "Why are you not burning?" You are supposed to stay lit until the end.

Then the fourth candle spoke gently to the child. "Don't be afraid, for I am Hope and while I still burn, we can relight the other candles." With shining eyes, the child took the candle of Hope and lit the other three candles.

Never let the flame of Hope go out. With Hope in your life, no matter how bad things may be, Peace, Faith, and Love may shine brightly once again.

~ Author unknown

While I have used this particular piece in one of my earlier blogs I thought it was worth a repeat.

Merry Christmas everyone!

Are We Thankful Yet?

How can I be thankful when my life is so messed up and difficult?

Somewhere in the deep, dark recesses of my heart, I cringe when people ask what I am thankful for. The bitter truth is that there are times when I don’t feel thankful at all; times when I am too busy being down on my self, my life, my kids, my husband, and those same five pounds that I lose over and over again – the ones that never seem to disappear. Even when my “poor me” pity party comes to an end, it’s not like life’s problems magically disappear and I am suddenly happy and at peace because all is right in my little corner of the world.

The process of wrestling my spirit into submission and choosing an attitude of gratitude in the midst of real life circumstances often begins with that still small voice in my head (or is it my heart) whispering a gentle reminder of something for which I am thankful. I work really hard to reject the thought and put it out of my mind so I can hang on to the fear, worry, anger, frustration, and disappointment to which I desperately cling.

I feel myself slipping when the words from James 1:2 flash onto the big screen plasma display in my mind, “Consider it all joy, my brothers (and sisters), when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance.” I can’t believe they made me memorize Bible verses in Sunday School – I’m trying to feel sorry for myself here!

The list of things for which I am thankful begins to grow – two cell phones, two computers, two cars, and a home with a guest house (and great renters). Then I remember those five pounds and realize I’ve never gone to bed hungry (not even close).

The list starts to multiply exponentially to include things for which I am truly grateful – a loving husband and family and a circle of close friends who love and accept me as I am. The pace picks up and the list expands - nature, beauty, adventure, health, provision, love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, discipline, purpose, meaning, and fulfillment. Suddenly, in spite of my best efforts to the contrary, I am humbled and overcome with a deep sense of gratitude.

How can I not be thankful even when life is so messed up and difficult?

After years of repeating this ridiculous cycle of resisting God’s Spirit as he drags me kicking and screaming into a state of thankfulness, I have learned an important lesson. Here it is. I don’t have to wait until I feel thankful to be thankful. An attitude of gratitude is not something that happens to me. It’s a moment by moment choice.

Choosing a grateful heart sensitizes me to the needs of others and strengthens my faith. I can choose to be thankful, not just for the good stuff, but for everything God allows into my life – including the relational struggles and difficult circumstances he uses to shape and grow me. I can choose to be grateful for a loving heavenly father who walks with me through the dark and difficult seasons of life and promises to never leave or forsake me.

That being said, it’s hard to thank God when life seems to be spinning out of control – when I’m doubting God’s sovereignty (how could he allow this to happen), questioning his wisdom (doesn’t he know this is important), or wondering if he is paying attention (has he forgotten me completely). This point is the crux of the issue – the fulcrum upon which the entire existence of faith in God balances.

In spite of how I feel, I can choose to have faith in the fact that God is sovereign and wise and good. By faith, I can choose to trust his promises and believe that he loves me – then (and only then) I can choose to be thankful.

By God’s grace I am no longer waiting for an unexpected measure of gratitude. I am choosing day by day, moment by moment to proactively adopt an attitude of gratitude. I invite you to join me.

Here’s to a Happy (and gratitude-filled) Thanksgiving.